Stream of Consciousness 9

There have been thoughts swirling around my mind so here they are:

First of all, I'm getting tired of people making a gun with their hands and pretending to shoot themselves whenever they're slightly upset or angry. Suicide is not something to take lightly. I know a lot of people who do this all the time and it has just recently started bothering me, so I will probably be telling you this next time I see you do it.

Second, I think it's sad that so many words have lost their meaning. Or their meaning has become less profound. Words such as "awesome" and "hate."
We use "awesome" to describe anything from God, the creator of the universe, to the taco we had for dinner last night.
"Hate" is used to describe an actual intense and passionate loathing and also a vague disliking of something.

Third, it's the end of the school year (almost) and I am so ready to be on Summer vacation...

Fourth, I hate it when people rag on fiction books as if they can't teach you anything. I swear the best fiction books cause you to think about things. Harry Potter, any John Green book, Divergent, The Hunger Games. Just because the book isn't packed full of facts and ideas doesn't mean that it's useless. I understand you might prefer nonfiction. And I'm okay with that. I really am. I think nonfiction books are very educational. I just find them boring. In the same way that someone who enjoys nonfiction might find the ridiculous adventures of a hobbit to be a snooze-fest.
Just don't go telling me fiction is useless.

Sixth, I am about fed up with the internet. (She says on the internet.) Social networking as turned all of us into narcissistic cowards with a self-esteem problem. 

Seventh, I just finished reading "An Abundance of Katherines." Great book. Everyone go and read it right now. Well, it got me thinking about my fourth point up there. I want to write something that actually means something. Something that isn't just some dumb story, you know? And it's really hard for me to come up with an idea that I think is worth sharing and then also coming up with a story to properly communicate is.
Or just coming up with a story that is worthwhile....
So, I have put the editing of my National Novel Writing Month novel on hold until I can come up with a way to make it worth reading. :)

And I guess that's the end. I could go one for forever but no one wants to read that.

Much love,
Amanda <3

The Unappreciated and The Overlooked in Everyday Life

So today IS Good Friday, but I have no original or interesting thoughts on Good Friday. So instead I'm writing about things that a lot of people ignore or don't value as much as they should. And since I'm really into making lists lately, I have formed a list. Here we go.

1) Eyes/Eye Contact

     I think eye contact has really gotten forgotten about in today's society. But eyes are really quite beautiful. Also, eye contact shows that you're listening and actually care about the person. So, as scary as it is to actually connect with the people around you, really try and make eye contact. For some reason, I've just been really noticing everyone's eye color lately and it's really interesting. 

Seriously. Eyes. Eye contact. Appreciate them. 

2) Silence

      In a society that's dominated by distraction, silence has gotten pushed aside. Instead it's"thoughtful music" or whatever. Now, music is great and stuff but silence is beautiful. There's literally nothing disturbing you. One of my favorite things about winter is when I'm outside getting the mail or something and I can't hear anything but the sound of my feet and my breath. Lately I've been listening to music almost all the time and I've realized that there's a vast amount of thinking that can be done in the silence. 

3) Stars

     Stars are things we see all the time. Every night. So I think we don't take time to realize their brilliance. Once I sit and really look at the stars (No matter how little I can see from wherever I am) I really start to think about how amazing God is and how unbelievable it is that he cares about us even though we're this little speck in the universe. 

4) Cloudy Days

     I, personally, quite like cloudy days. I don't understand why people don't like them. So, if you don't, please tell me why. I love them. Especially when I'm inside and I can just look outside at the clouds... Yeah... That makes me happy.

5) Empty Notebook Paper

     There's just so much potential in blank notebook paper.

Yeah that's all I could think of right now. If you have any others I'd love to hear them! 

I hope you have a great day!

Much love,

Amanda <3


PS I changed my blog again. What do you think? Baby Mike is so adorable. :)

Stream of Consciousness 8

So, I haven't blogged in a while so I thought "What the heck? I'll write one now!" So here I am.
Two major things have been on my mind recently. 1) School. 2) Not just hearing God's voice, but actually heeding what he's saying. I don't really feel like talking specifically about either of these things right now... So I'm not sure what else to talk about. But I figure if I just start writing something some idea will come to me and I can just ramble on that for a while....

I've recently been getting into the folk genre of music... It's actually pretty nice. Although the songs can be pretty sad every now and then it's actually not that bad. My brother bought the Inside Llewyn Davis soundtrack and it's amazing. I'd highly recommend it.

Speaking of things I'd recommend, I've been thinking about The Fault in Our Stars a lot recently. And I think I've come around to actually liking it and recommending it to people. Why? I don't know. But it really made me think and there is not too much YA books out there that make you think about things like love, and death, and happiness. Or they do, but the don't leave it up to the reader to draw his or her own conclusions. They tell the reader their opinion and then leave it at that. The Fault in Our Stars really forces you to think about things. John Greens theology is far from the hope that Jesus gives us. Which made me really sad and caused the book to have a hopeless tone to it.
So, if you haven't read it yet,  read it. But know that life doesn't have to be like that.

Also, if you haven't yet seen Captain America 2, you should most definitely watch it. (Only, of course, if you have seen the first one and the other Marvel movies.) The Winter Soldier is intense and the first fights between him and Captain are epic. Also there was some really good twists in it. The themes were good too.
Just... Just see it, okay?

Let's see... What else has been happening to me recently?
Oh, I just got an email from the summer camp I'm working at this Summer and it included all this paper work and whatnot. One of the things was this thing stating that I agree with the camp's "zero tolerance" policy for sexual abuse of children. And it made me sad that that wasn't assumed of me, you know? Like I have to sign something ensuring that I won't sexual harass children and I'll report it if I see it happen.
I dunno.... I just think it's sad that sexual abuse has become so common that I have to read and sign all these things....
I'm actually really excited to go to this camp because ever since 3rd grade I've wanted to be a SaLT (It's like a counselor in training) and now I finally can!

Man I wish people would quit quoting CS Lewis all the time. I mean, yeah the guy said some good things but honestly, give it a rest. It's like everything he says is true or something. Like, people read The Screwtape Letters and cite it as truth. What if he's wrong? I read something that practically used a quote of his to support the reliability of the Gospels. What?
CS LEWIS IS NOT GOD AND HIS BOOKS ARE NOT THE BIBLE. CREATE AN ARGUMENT FOR YOUR OPINIONS AND BACK IT UP USING ACTUAL STUFF NOT JUST SOME STORY CS LEWIS DECIDED TO USE, OKAY?

I just found a dubstep version of "Pippin's Song" from The Lord of the Rings. Don't listen to it. It kind of sucks a lot....

So... Profanity. What makes it profane? How long until a profane word becomes commonplace and a different work takes its place? I don't know...

I'm rewriting my NaNoWriMo novel. (Did I tell you that already?) Whatever. It's really hard because I 'm trying to make things make sense this time. But the characters don't really make that much sense to me right now so...

Here's a picture of a pug:

Have a great day, whoever is reading this!

Much love,

Amanda. <3

Distractions

So last night I decided I should probably catch up on my Bible reading. (I was like four chapters behind.) So I read Hebrews 12 and 13. It took me a while to get my mind centered on God because I had just finished a really sad book and then also I was thinking about a whole bunch of other stuff. And the first two verses of Hebrews 12 says,

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, we much get rid of every weight and the sin that clings so closely, and run with endurance the race set out for us, keeping out eyes fixed on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of our faith. For the joy set out for him he endured the cross, disregarding its shame, and has taken his seat at the right hand of the throne of God." (That's NET.)

These verses kind of slapped me in the face, telling me to pay attention. Specifically to my quiet time that night. But it can also be applied to everything. 

One of the first things I was told when I started running was to look straight ahead of me. Not at my feet or the ground in front of my feet, but straight ahead of me. Not surprisingly, it helped. And it works here. When I'm just looking at whatever is straight in front of me, I can run. But once I get distracted by stuff, it gets hard. My form gets sloppy tiring my body out. And then I'm screwed, basically. 

In the same way, if I really want to serve God wholly and get as close to perfect as I can, I need to look right ahead of me, to God. Not thinking about anything else. Throughout everything, not just when I'm supposed to be in church or something. 100% of the time I should be focused on what God wants me to do. 

Which is quite difficult, I might add. Especially since there are things that aren't exactly sinful, but they're distracting me from what's really important. 

In life, don't let yourself get distracted or weighed down by stupid things. Just focus on Jesus and run towards him. 

Okay... I guess that's kind of a short post. But I was just thinking about this last night and then also decided I hadn't blogged in a while so...

I have some other stuff to say, but I wanted this to have it's own post.  

Much love,

Amanda <3

Stream of Consciousness 7

Yeah so... I'm slightly  bored and have an unquenchable desire to write something. And I thought "Hey! I have a perfectly decent blog for this very reason!" So here I am.
My mom got a new keyboard and it's really frustrating because I have to press down harder than I'm used to. So this post will probably take twice as long because I'll have to keep backspacing to re-type words and whatnot.

I added an About Me page. It's over there somewhere... ----> In case you're curious.

Here's a picture in case
you needed to know...

I recently started reading Divergent. Mostly because the movie is coming out and it looked interesting. Even though I have been told multiple times by multiple people that it sucks, I'm reading it. I'm about halfway through since I stayed up until  2 AM (technically 3 AM since it's daylight savings time) reading it. So far I really like it. But, you know, that's subject to change. I think it presents some really interesting concepts. What is bravery? What is selflessness? What is knowledge? In this book the characters must choose only one. Do they want to learn to be brave? honest? peaceful? wise? humble? But then there's this one girl, Tris, who is called "Divergent" because she could belong equally with three of the different groups.
I'm worried that the romance will ruin it, though. And it looks like that's where it's heading. The last few popular teen books I read ended up really sucking. So I'm hoping this one is semi-okay. I might even see the movie.


I'm thinking about joining this writing group at my library. But I hate sharing my writing with people. And this will be people I don't even know. Do you know how terrifying that is? But at the same time, it will help me improve as a writer... So I don't know.


You know what is really hard? Respecting someone even though they've done nothing to earn your respect. You just have to give it to them because they're in a position of authority. Or when someone with less knowledge than you in a certain subjects tell you you're doing it wrong and you have to do what they say because they're in charge of you.
It's honestly one of the hardest things that I struggle with. And then I get reminded that I'm actually not that great, and I should have grace on those people who are just doing the best they can. I need to grit my teeth and bare it and respect authority.


I'm surprised people actually read this. I rarely read blogs.... Thanks for reading!

The other day I tweeted "It's a shame when perfectly decent notebook paper is wasted on something as mundane as History notes." And my History teacher found the tweet. I'm fairly certain he took in personally. Like I was saying his class was a waste of time. But I said "mundane" meaning "dull, not interesting." Not useless. If I wanted to say useless I would have just said useless...
That was one of my more awkward experiences at school.....


A few friends of mine are getting married! I remember when I was young and it was my parent's friends getting married and now it's all of my friends.... And that is strange...


My brother and I went to a Propaganda concert the other night. He's excellent. You should check him out. Right now. One of his songs is on my Songs To Hear page. It's the first one.
 I'll wait........
He's pretty awesome, right? If you want to download both of his albums for free, go to humblebeast.com and you shall not regret it.
One of my favorite things was waiting outside with a group of people who were just there to have a good time. Also, while we were waiting to see if there were still tickets left, Propaganda came out and did a song on the concrete for us because there was a chance we wouldn't get it. I think that's cool when an artist isn't so famous or so stuck up that he won't come out and meet the fans or whatever. I just think it's cool.


Well, I suppose I've bored you enough now. However, I could keep rambling for ever and a day. But no one wants to read that.

Much Love,
Amanda  <3

The Things That Make Me Smile

I know a whole lot of people who are suffering right now. And there's a whole lotta stuff wrong in the world. So these are some things that make me smile all the time without fail. 

I hope I can help you smile a little bit too. 

1) Pugs. 

LOOK AT THE LITTLE GUYS:

2) Seeing someone's entire self light up when talking about something they are passionate about. 

3)Seeing a dad spend time with his kids. 

      The other day there was a dad with his two little girls at ballet practice. Probably one of the most adorable things I have ever seen in my life. 

4) The smell of the mountains. Especially after it rains

5) The sound of fall leaves blowing across the ground. 

6) The sound of a campfire. 

7) The satisfying scratch of a pencil on paper. 

8) Weddings

9) This:

10) Carl and Ellie in "Up:

11) Baby Mike from "Monster's University"

So adorable. :3

12) Calvin and Hobbes:

Well, that's all I could think of right now.... I have school to do anyway.  What are the things that make you smile even if your day sucks?

Much love,

Amanda

<3

Every Idle Word

Matthew 12:36-37 "But I tell you the truth, every careless word that people speak, they shall give an accounting for it on the day of judgement. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned."

That's one of those verse you read and then pretend like you didn't read it so you don't have to actually do what it says, right? 

Recently a friend of mine shared that he'd been convicted of the things he says to other people and the whole time he was saying this (this was a few weeks ago) all I was thinking was Good for him. As if I don't have to be more careful about the things I say. Really I should have been feeling just as guilty as he was. But I wasn't. 

Until yesterday. 

Long story short, I said some mean things to a few people. The worst part is that I didn't even really realize they were that hurtful until I saw their reactions. The defeat in their eyes and the disbelief that I actually said what I said. 

I apologized when I had time to actually make a meaningful apology. They said they forgave me and all the other stuff that goes along with an apology. I know that God forgave me after I confessed to it to him. But I can't help but think that even though I've been forgiven, my words won't still have a negative impact. And I hate thinking that I have now become a person who could haunt the minds of another person just because of something I said. 

You grow up learning to "think before you speak." When you're a kid there are consequences from authority figures when you say something mean. You get put in Time-Out or something. But now that I'm in High School it's passed off as sarcasm or "just kidding" and there's no real consequences for what you say because it's only "sarcasm." This is ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous.

I think we can all say we've been hurt by sarcasm and jokes made at our expense. No one likes it when it happens to them but there's no hesitation to do it to others. I'm pretty sure that I'd start crying if someone told me what I told them yesterday. 

~~~~

So here's my point:  If I ever say something to you that hurts you in any way, don't hesitate to let me know. If you hear me saying something hurtful to someone else or about someone else, don't hesitate to let me know. 

I think everyone would benefit from just shutting up most of the time.
Words are all we have, so make them meaningful and useful for someone other than yourself. 

There are a million songs I could tell you to listen to that are about being careful of what you say. But I really can't think of any that I like enough to recommend. But if you find any interesting ones, let me know?

Much love,

Amanda <3